1. Post #1
    The next time you're looking for help at Newark Liberty, JFK, or LaGuardia airport, the answer to your question might come from a friendly, beautiful woman. Just don't expect that woman to be an actual, live human.
    As part of a new customer-service initiative, The Port Authority of New York and New Jersey has installed an avatar — interactive video projected on the plexiglass cutout of a woman's form — in each of its three member airports. The hologram-like spokesperson will be able to guide passengers towards the right gate, inform them of security checkpoint rules, and can even fire off a sales pitch for an airport's duty-free shops. This isn't the maiden voyage for the tech, though — these holographic helpers were installed in Paris's Orly airport last year.
    According to The Wall Street Journal, The Port Authority entered into a six-month agreement to rent the high-tech holograms after a customer-satisfaction survey revealed people wanted more human interaction. We're not sure who decided this was the best way to provide human interaction, but nevertheless, the new avatars went into service for the first time on Monday.

    How the new technology will pan out has yet to be seen, but we'll be the first to state the obvious — The Port Authority just paid $180,000 to rent three (somewhat creepy) fake humans when they could have paid half that to hire real people. Real people, who would presumably be better equipped to handle actual questions. But then again, real humans wouldn't exactly be the future, now, would they?
    http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/technolo...024937526.html

    Just some time before some Japanese dude tries to marry it. Or fuck it.
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  2. Post #2
    I'LL NEVER STOP
    Dennab
    July 2008
    2,667 Posts
    That speech makes her sound like a slut
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  3. Post #3
    Gold Member
    Mr. Someguy's Avatar
    March 2006
    25,211 Posts
    The Port Authority entered into a six-month agreement to rent the high-tech holograms after a customer-satisfaction survey revealed people wanted more human interaction
    Need more human interaction, rent holograms? I don't follow your logic...
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  4. Post #4
    metromod.net
    _Chewgum's Avatar
    April 2010
    2,217 Posts
    I wonder if the people who developed it thinks everyone is 8 years old.
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  5. Post #5
    Emi Waifu 2011 <3
    IMoo's Avatar
    November 2010
    1,732 Posts
    Is her name Avina?
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  6. Post #6
    Gold Member
    _Maverick_'s Avatar
    November 2010
    7,533 Posts
    mind instantly jumped to those mass effect holograms
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  7. Post #7
    I can't think of a good title.
    Reds's Avatar
    May 2010
    14,805 Posts
    The worst part about this hologram is that I can't punch it for being so patronizingly annoying.
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  8. Post #8
    Gold Member

    February 2005
    3,396 Posts
    Wow, the way she talked was so suggestive.

    "I can be used for just about anything, I can say what you want, dress how you want and be just about ANYTHING you want me to be"
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  9. Post #9
    Dennab
    October 2010
    1,428 Posts
    How necessary.
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  10. Post #10
     
    Dennab
    May 2006
    9,120 Posts


    Welcome to JFK International Airport, Commander Shepard.
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  11. Post #11
    Gold Member
    Coyoteze's Avatar
    November 2011
    11,905 Posts
    Is it projected into/onto a glass panel or something? The shape looks fixed. And that kinda annoys me.
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  12. Post #12
    ASK ME ABOUT MY BEN FOLDS FETISH
    FreakySoup's Avatar
    April 2010
    3,199 Posts
    I saw one of those things at a mall last year, it was some kind of credit card ad

  13. Post #13
    Gold Member
    _Maverick_'s Avatar
    November 2010
    7,533 Posts

    The white zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers, do not park in the red zone

    (old movie reference)
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  14. Post #14
    Gold Member
    Mlisen14's Avatar
    September 2008
    3,131 Posts
    Is it projected into/onto a glass panel or something? The shape looks fixed. And that kinda annoys me.
    Yeah you can tell her hair is too big for the board it's projected onto. Her shoulders change size too.
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  15. Post #15
    🚑 Sarcasm Wambulance 🚑
    SEKCobra's Avatar
    January 2009
    14,956 Posts
    Perfect example of not using the word hologram right
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  16. Post #16
    Gold Member
    Killoch0's Avatar
    July 2006
    598 Posts

    The white zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers, do not park in the red zone

    (old movie reference)

    No the red zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers, do not park in the white zone.
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  17. Post #17
    Gold Member
    Swebonny's Avatar
    August 2006
    14,820 Posts
    I wonder if the people who developed it thinks everyone is 8 years old.
    It's in United States so yeah.
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  18. Post #18
    Gold Member
    FreakyMe's Avatar
    December 2005
    5,321 Posts
    It's gonna suck when advertisers have easy access to this technology.

    It doesn't matter what gets invented - it'll either get sold to us or be used to sell to us.
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  19. Post #19
    Apple extraordinaire~ ♥
    eddy-tt-'s Avatar
    April 2006
    5,255 Posts
    That grin makes me want to punch it.
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  20. Post #20
    Gold Member
    Zambies!'s Avatar
    August 2009
    7,680 Posts
    It's in United States so yeah.
    Point being...?
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  21. Post #21
    Ask me about my 'female train' fetish.
    ViralHatred's Avatar
    January 2006
    5,144 Posts


    Welcome to JFK International Airport, Commander Shepard.
    "What about the TSA?"

    "I have no information on the “TSA.” References to such an organisation exist in some conspiracy theories related to airports."
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  22. Post #22

    April 2011
    346 Posts
    I would tap that hologram.
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  23. Post #23
    As a wise man once said: Never ask Fatfatfatty for computer advice
    Dennab
    March 2009
    9,166 Posts
    So it's basically just a projector and a piece of cardboard?
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  24. Post #24
    Gold Member
    Swebonny's Avatar
    August 2006
    14,820 Posts
    Point being...?
    Chill out, it was a joke.

    And the point? Check this thread:
    http://www.facepunch.com/threads/1185935
    And you'll get the point.
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  25. Post #25
    DID I MENTION I PLAY BANJO
    Hardpoint Nomad's Avatar
    July 2010
    3,472 Posts
    No the red zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers, do not park in the white zone.
    Don't start with that Red Zone shit again, Betty.
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  26. Post #26
    Gold Member
    _Maverick_'s Avatar
    November 2010
    7,533 Posts
    Don't start with that Red Zone shit again, Betty.
    I know what this is about, you want me to have that abortion.
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  27. Post #27
    Phaselancer's Avatar
    May 2011
    899 Posts
    Apparently we are in the future. Neat.
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  28. Post #28
    Wow!👏Great moves! 👍Keep it up!😁
    J!NX's Avatar
    February 2006
    46,082 Posts
    They should've picked something more... not slutty.
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  29. Post #29
    Gold Member
    Hellduck's Avatar
    March 2007
    5,517 Posts
    Trying to take scissors on the plane: "I'm afraid I can't let you do that, passenger."
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  30. Post #30
    "This flight is far too important for me to allow you to jeopardize it, passenger."

  31. Post #31
    If the mods approve of this title they hereby admit that they are all massive faggots
    koeniginator's Avatar
    October 2009
    4,689 Posts
    voice too slutty 2/10 wouldn't fuck
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  32. Post #32
    Dennab
    November 2006
    6,641 Posts
    "I can be anything you want me too be"

    Alright cunt, take up the image of a anthropomorphic ... furry of some sort.
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  33. Post #33
    Triarii's Avatar
    September 2011
    397 Posts
    I would tap that hologram.
    No go dammit, you're not japanese.

    [SUB]or are you?[/SUB]

  34. Post #34
    Spends his cash on looking flash and grabbing your attention
    Rents's Avatar
    January 2012
    10,017 Posts
    "Hi, I'm NG Resonance, what would you like to talk about?"
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  35. Post #35
    Gold Member
    TheLolrus's Avatar
    June 2008
    3,765 Posts
    I know what this is about, you want me to have that abortion.
    It's really the only sensible thing to do, if it's done safely. Therapeutically there's no danger involved.
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  36. Post #36
    Gold Member
    Blooper Reel's Avatar
    February 2011
    6,182 Posts
    I've seen these before over here in the UK in Birmingham Airport, they were dotted around to help people through Customs, but they were incapable of answering questions and just kept saying the same thing over and over again. (Guidelines, instructions etc.)



    They didn't sound like sluts though.

  37. Post #37
    Gold Member
    trotskygrad's Avatar
    June 2011
    8,354 Posts
    The Port Authority just paid $180,000 to rent three (somewhat creepy) fake humans when they could have paid half that to hire real people. Real people, who would presumably be better equipped to handle actual questions. But then again, real humans wouldn't exactly be the future, now, would they?

    hiring real people creates less jobs.
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  38. Post #38
    Gold Member
    Ray-The-Sun's Avatar
    December 2007
    11,543 Posts
    AaaaaaaAAAAAH! Kill it! Kill it now!

  39. Post #39
    Gold Member
    Blooper Reel's Avatar
    February 2011
    6,182 Posts
    AaaaaaaAAAAAH! Kill it! Kill it now!
    Even worse is that the lower part isn't a hologram, and the hologram itself goes out during the intervals between announcements and speeches, meaning once she finishes up whatever she's saying you're suddenly face to face with an abomination whose upper body is a human shaped void of darkness.
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  40. Post #40
    Gundevil's Avatar
    April 2009
    500 Posts
    I could have used this when I got off my flight from Stockholm. Had to wander for an hour after trying to understand that typical Brooklyn accent.