1. Post #1
    Gold Member
    ItchyBarracuda's Avatar
    March 2005
    1,561 Posts
    The Guardian posted:
    Michael Jackson will be buried without his brain today after doctors retained it following an autopsy to help determine the cause of death.

    The King of Pop will be saluted in grand fashion at the Staples Centre memorial ceremony, and reportedly laid to rest at Los Angeles's Forest Lawn cemetery. However, the LA coroner's office has still not completed its tests on Jackson's brain, and the singer's family have been advised that unless they wish to wait, he must be buried without it.

    Jackson died from an apparent cardiac arrest on 25 June. Though his body was released the next day to relatives, his brain was not. The pop star's inert brain must "harden" for at least two weeks before doctors can conduct their neuropathology tests.

    Doctors will examine Jackson's brain to help determine the cause of death, suspected of being linked to painkillers. Such examinations can also reveal unknown diseases, evidence of alcohol abuse or whether Jackson has suffered overdoses in the past.

    Removing the brain is the "only way to carry out the tests" according to a source for the Mirror. "The tissue has to be examined. I can't tell you how long that is going to take."

    Jackson's funeral will begin with a closed-casket family service, followed by a Staples Centre memorial for more than 11,000 fans.


    This is pretty horrifying actually. It explains why the ceremony was closed casket. As grim as this is, and how moving a ceremony it was today, there is a bizarre irony I couldn't help but point out. He played the Scarecrow in The Wiz. The Scarecrow in The Wizard of Oz didn't have a brain either.


    So yeah...here come the news jokes because this board is full of douchebags. Calling these before they're posted to ruin your fun

    "Wait he had a brain?"

    "Now they can really see what was going on in there"

    "Real life Thriller imminent"

    "Now he doesn't have to worry about be ravaged by zombies"

    "BRAIN IN ROBOT"


    If you managed to think of one not listed, touche.
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  2. Post #2
    Gold Member
    hl2poo's Avatar
    November 2005
    4,426 Posts
    Oh god that is nasty.
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  3. Post #3
    PrismatexV3's Avatar
    December 2008
    465 Posts
    I saw this a couple days ago.

    This whole affair of him dying has been 100% bizarre.
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  4. Post #4
    Gold Member
    EliteGuy's Avatar
    November 2006
    7,006 Posts
    Thread music
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  5. Post #5
    shill's Avatar
    September 2006
    228 Posts
    embedding disabled
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  6. Post #6
    Gold Member
    Spacewolf's Avatar
    January 2006
    7,985 Posts
    What the...
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  7. Post #7
    Secure, Contain, Protect.
    Zombii's Avatar
    October 2008
    8,019 Posts
    It's really not that bizarre.
    Lots of people had their brain removed before/after burial.
    Like Einstein. Fuck I may just be rambling, don't listen to me.
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  8. Post #8
    GeneralKidd's Avatar
    May 2009
    148 Posts
    embedding disabled
    PROTIP:

    Click on the video to go to its YouTube page!
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  9. Post #9
    Gold Member
    Garlickeh's Avatar
    April 2008
    2,418 Posts
    So what happened to that about Michael Jackson wanting to preserve his body after death and all that?
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  10. Post #10
    Gold Member
    EliteGuy's Avatar
    November 2006
    7,006 Posts
    embedding disabled
    fixed
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  11. Post #11
    Gold Member
    SilverHammer's Avatar
    April 2006
    4,604 Posts
    It's so he can't come back as a zombie.

    LOL!
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  12. Post #12
    Gold Member
    gnome's Avatar
    July 2005
    2,874 Posts
    Freeze it.
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  13. Post #13

    July 2009
    55 Posts
    JaMONE!
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  14. Post #14
    Gold Member
    peabrain101's Avatar
    December 2005
    2,196 Posts
    It's so he can't come back as a zombie.

    LOL!
    Damned moderator ninja.

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  15. Post #15
    Gold Member
    gamefreekv2's Avatar
    July 2006
    214 Posts
    That's terrible. Who cares how he dies, let the man be buried with his brain!
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  16. Post #16
    Best Woofie On Facepunch!
    Fangz's Avatar
    July 2007
    6,214 Posts
    They just killed all the thriller jokes by removing his brain.

    On the other hand, they created a whole bunch of Moonwalker jokes (he is a cyborg in the music video).
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  17. Post #17
    ashxu's Avatar
    February 2009
    22,953 Posts
    Lies. They're gonna put Michael Jackson's brain into a robot.
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  18. Post #18
    Gold Member
    Greeman's Avatar
    June 2006
    4,110 Posts
    How could Michael Jackson have been the Scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz if the movie was made decades before he was born.


    am I reading something wrong.
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  19. Post #19
    Gold Member
    poryon2's Avatar
    October 2006
    2,165 Posts
    How could Michael Jackson have been the Scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz if the movie was made decades before he was born.


    am I reading something wrong.
    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0078504/
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  20. Post #20
    Doritos46's Avatar
    February 2009
    48 Posts
    Damned moderator ninja.



    ??
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  21. Post #21
    Super Hoborator
    SuperHoboMan's Avatar
    May 2007
    6,842 Posts
    They should put his brain in a robot body.

    And Andrian Barbobot.

    Heart for anyone that gets the reference
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  22. Post #22
    nubcakez's Avatar
    January 2008
    2,586 Posts
    Not really surprised, there are no ways to stuff the brain back after an autopsy.
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  23. Post #23
    Gold Member
    Greeman's Avatar
    June 2006
    4,110 Posts
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  24. Post #24
    Dennab
    August 2007
    1,106 Posts
    i want it
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  25. Post #25
    Eleventeen's Avatar
    August 2008
    1,261 Posts
    Talk about disrespectful
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  26. Post #26
    The Un-Men's Avatar
    October 2007
    1,170 Posts
    Wasn't his body being conserved in that museum?
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  27. Post #27
    Gold Member
    Xystus234's Avatar
    July 2008
    2,286 Posts
    The only reason I'd ever want my brain to be taken out is so that it can be hooked up to some sort of brain-in-a-jar machine.

    Like this:


    EDIT: Don't rate me artistic, I didn't draw this shit.
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  28. Post #28
    Gold Member
    Gmod_Fan77's Avatar
    January 2009
    4,386 Posts
    Wasn't there a report several months ago about Michael Jackson wanting scientists to use his brain to bring him back to life as a robot?
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  29. Post #29
    Gold Member
    Squad's Avatar
    March 2009
    3,365 Posts
    Misread
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  30. Post #30
    Gold Member
    ItchyBarracuda's Avatar
    March 2005
    1,561 Posts
    Actually he played the Scarecrow in "The Wiz" not "The Wizard of Oz".

    They are two different movies.
    Did you read the fucking post?
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  31. Post #31
    fakedout's Avatar
    December 2007
    1,260 Posts
    it must "harden"
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  32. Post #32
    Gold Member
    Squad's Avatar
    March 2009
    3,365 Posts
    Did you read the fucking post?
    Yeah, but I am assuming the fact that it said Wizard of Oz right after it said The Wiz just made me assume the previous was the current.
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  33. Post #33
    Gold Member

    July 2007
    3,305 Posts
    And life continues on, nothing of value was lost.
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  34. Post #34
    Gold Member
    Squad's Avatar
    March 2009
    3,365 Posts
    And life continues on, nothing of value was lost.
    Except the valuable time of the scientist.

    Kidding of course...
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  35. Post #35
    sibelius's Avatar
    June 2009
    109 Posts
    shit, he played the scarecrow?
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  36. Post #36
    Facepunch Babysitter
    BANNED USER's Avatar
    July 2009
    12,430 Posts
    He is moonwalking all over satan right now for what he did to those kids.
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  37. Post #37
    ORGLAR's Avatar
    November 2008
    511 Posts
    That's terrible. Who cares how he dies, let the man be buried with his brain!
    He's dead he doesn't fucking care.
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  38. Post #38
    SM0K3 B4N4N4's Avatar
    March 2008
    1,574 Posts
    He's dead he doesn't fucking care.

    orly?

    Anyways it doesn't really matter whether he's buried with his brain or not, a dead corpse is a dead corpse, any part that was Michael Jackson is gone, if there is an afterlife or not.
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  39. Post #39
    Gold Member
    xpod1's Avatar
    February 2009
    18,248 Posts
    After some of that buildup, I expected it to cut to Thriller.
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  40. Post #40
    Teh_Cheese's Avatar
    June 2008
    3,707 Posts
    I find this funny.
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