1. Post #1
    JaspertheDoxie's Avatar
    August 2009
    804 Posts
    This may be a rather shitty post, but there are tornado outbreaks all over the state of Oklahoma. The worst part for me is that they'll be arriving at the capital in about 2-3 hours, and I'm fucking SCARED. I was wondering if I could get any survival tips, from anyone who's been in this sort of situation. I'm on the verge of shitting my pants.
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  2. Post #2
    Facepunch Babysitter
    BANNED USER's Avatar
    July 2009
    12,304 Posts
    Get inside closet or bathroom if you know one is going to hit, getting into a basement or public shelter would be better options though. And avoid Hospitals, they need to treat emergencies, and don't need the hassle of the general public.
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  3. Post #3
    KarloMcMarlo's Avatar
    January 2012
    712 Posts
    Grab an old mattress, head to the basement with it, hide under it with a few things you might need if your house comes down on you (swiss army knife, flashlight, bit of food and water, etc).

    And try not to piss your pants.
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  4. Post #4
    Falubii's Avatar
    May 2010
    3,457 Posts
    If you are dumb and decide to start driving about while these tornadoes are about to hit, lay down flat in a ditch. DO NOT TAKE SHELTER IN AN OVERPASS. That is all.
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  5. Post #5
    JaspertheDoxie's Avatar
    August 2009
    804 Posts
    I have about 2 more hours until they hit.

  6. Post #6
    LOO POO'S BIG FAN !!!!!!!! LOVES SHITPOSTING ALMOST AS MUCH!!!!
    Yahnich's Avatar
    October 2009
    8,758 Posts
    go as deep as your house allows you if you're really afraid of a headon collision with a tornado
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  7. Post #7
    Gold Member
    Cheshire_cat's Avatar
    September 2006
    3,813 Posts
    I'm over here in beeeew-teee-fuuul Missouri, so here's a few tips that may or may not work. Bear in mind that I've never even seen a tornado, but these are most likely some good ideas to follow.

    1. Find a safe spot that you can stay at. A basement, a closet close to the center of your house, a storm cellar, etc.
    2. Stock your 'shelter' with some basic necessities. Food, water, a change of clothes, some money, and a flashlight. A weather radio would be useful if you have one.
    3. If you can, stay at your shelter until the storm passes. If you can't, wait and try to relax. Watch the Weather Channel (if you still have a satellite connection), read a book, browse the Internet - just keep your mind occupied and as stress-free as possible.
    4. If you hear tornado sirens, a roaring sound, or - God forbid - you actually see the funnel cloud, then flee to your shelter and don't leave it until the sirens shut off. Keep an eye out for swirling debris - even if the funnel cloud hasn't reached the ground, it could still cause damage. Once the storm slackens, check the skies, then leave if the weather has begun to calm.

    Above all else, stay calm. I've heard tornado sirens throughout my life, and every time they reach my ears, I've felt that shit-your-pants factor. Don't stress out unduly, keep a level head, and use your common sense.
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  8. Post #8
    Ask me about my .gif fetish
    st0rmforce's Avatar
    February 2008
    3,594 Posts
    Run outside and give the tornado a hug. It's just lonely.
    How would you like it if everybody ran indoors and hid in the basement every time you came to visit?
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  9. Post #9
    Dennab
    November 2009
    2,472 Posts
    Under the staircase is where i was told to go, matresses are also always a good idea.

  10. Post #10
    Get inside, get down to the lowest level of your house, and cover up with a blanket or something. If you don't have a basement, the Bathroom or interior closet is the next best choice. If you live in a mobile home, get the fuck out of it and lie down in the ditch, it's your last chance of survival. NEVER hide under a highway overpass, winds get funneled to even higher speeds in there, and you'll never stand a chance
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  11. Post #11
    Certified Catgirl Maid
    slayer20's Avatar
    January 2006
    9,396 Posts
    There have been tornado touchdowns here in Kansas since 5 or 6 o'clock I think. Nothing bad happened around my city, but I can't say the same for some others...

  12. Post #12
    Glod Menber
    TurbisV2's Avatar
    May 2008
    24,548 Posts
    pray to joe pesci
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  13. Post #13

    April 2012
    4 Posts
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  14. Post #14
    JWJ
    Meepwnd
    Dennab
    April 2010
    3,322 Posts
    pray to joe pesci
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  15. Post #15
    Gold Member
    D3TBS's Avatar
    March 2011
    8,723 Posts
    I found this book outside one day

    http://www.amazon.com/Worst-Case-Sce.../dp/0811831310

    and it doesnt say anything about tornadoes, although if you want to know how to survive in case an UFO abducts you, I can scan the pages
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  16. Post #16
    Gold Member
    Silikone's Avatar
    September 2006
    1,345 Posts
    No replies from him. I hope he's OK.
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  17. Post #17
    Dancing Member
    BlueYoshi's Avatar
    July 2009
    2,748 Posts
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  18. Post #18
    Sylerr's Avatar
    July 2008
    1,277 Posts
    Since you still have 3 hours, wouldn't it be a good idea to take a car and get the fuck out of there?
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  19. Post #19
    Ms. Andry
    Dori's Avatar
    August 2005
    10,038 Posts
    Since you still have 3 hours, wouldn't it be a good idea to take a car and get the fuck out of there?
    he had 3 hours 8 hours ago
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  20. Post #20
    Falubii's Avatar
    May 2010
    3,457 Posts
    Since you still have 3 hours, wouldn't it be a good idea to take a car and get the fuck out of there?
    He's not under a tornado warning (tornado is imminent), just a tornado watch (conditions are ideal for a tornado to form). It would be impractical for people in the Midwest to flee their homes every time they're put under a tornado watch.

  21. Post #21
    Gold Member
    ketchup v2's Avatar
    September 2011
    4,601 Posts
    He's not under a tornado warning (tornado is imminent), just a tornado watch (conditions are ideal for a tornado to form). It would be impractical for people in the Midwest to flee their homes every time they're put under a tornado watch.
    Regardless of this, you don't ever get in a car to flee from a tornado. That's how you die.
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  22. Post #22
    [B][URL="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tacos"]Tacos![/URL][/B]
    Jurikuer's Avatar
    April 2008
    5,450 Posts
    Woke up an hour ago, friend told me over 120 tornadoes hit America. Some kind of record high I guess.

  23. Post #23
    Falubii's Avatar
    May 2010
    3,457 Posts
    Regardless of this, you don't ever get in a car to flee from a tornado. That's how you die.
    That guy was assuming he had a 3 hour heads up.

  24. Post #24
    I'll do whatever you want me to do babe ;)
    Lord_Schrotty's Avatar
    September 2011
    1,780 Posts


    Did he survive?
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  25. Post #25
    Gold Member
    VaSTinY's Avatar
    May 2009
    4,948 Posts
    Stay the FUCK away from windows, you would not want to be near a window or in the same room as a window no matter what size it is
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  26. Post #26
    Gold Member
    Mr MP's Avatar
    April 2009
    1,895 Posts
    Hm, does anybody know where was he located. Maybe we'd find some news and see if everyone's okay.

  27. Post #27
    ice cream and pussy
    Jacam12SUX's Avatar
    March 2005
    2,001 Posts
    http://news.nationalpost.com/2012/04...__lsa=d5c252c6

    "At least five dead in Oklahoma as tornadoes pound U.S. Plains"

    "at least five people early on Sunday as storm sirens failed to sound in an Oklahoma town and caught people unaware."

    ._.
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  28. Post #28
    soccerskyman's Avatar
    October 2009
    4,209 Posts
    http://news.nationalpost.com/2012/04...__lsa=d5c252c6

    "At least five dead in Oklahoma as tornadoes pound U.S. Plains"

    "at least five people early on Sunday as storm sirens failed to sound in an Oklahoma town and caught people unaware."

    ._.
    Do they not test those weekly? They do over here.

    Edited:

    Then again, they are common as shit in central IL.

    Edited:

    I'm over here in beeeew-teee-fuuul Missouri, so here's a few tips that may or may not work. Bear in mind that I've never even seen a tornado, but these are most likely some good ideas to follow.

    1. Find a safe spot that you can stay at. A basement, a closet close to the center of your house, a storm cellar, etc.
    2. Stock your 'shelter' with some basic necessities. Food, water, a change of clothes, some money, and a flashlight. A weather radio would be useful if you have one.
    3. If you can, stay at your shelter until the storm passes. If you can't, wait and try to relax. Watch the Weather Channel (if you still have a satellite connection), read a book, browse the Internet - just keep your mind occupied and as stress-free as possible.
    4. If you hear tornado sirens, a roaring sound, or - God forbid - you actually see the funnel cloud, then flee to your shelter and don't leave it until the sirens shut off. Keep an eye out for swirling debris - even if the funnel cloud hasn't reached the ground, it could still cause damage. Once the storm slackens, check the skies, then leave if the weather has begun to calm.

    Above all else, stay calm. I've heard tornado sirens throughout my life, and every time they reach my ears, I've felt that shit-your-pants factor. Don't stress out unduly, keep a level head, and use your common sense.
    Here are some more tips:
    1. If you hear a siren, drop whatever the fuck you are doing and get to shelter ASAP. Fuck anything else, it's not worth your life.
    2. Stay away from windows and loose objects if you can. They can become debris easily.
    3.Your shelter should be underground and/or be a very solid structure. If you are out driving, DO NOT try to outrun the tornado. Get out of your car, and lay as low as possible in a ditch. Cover your head and lay face down.
    4. STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM OVERPASSES/TUNNELS/DRAINS. They will turn into a vacuum and pull you right into the tornado.

  29. Post #29
    Gold Member
    Dennab
    March 2007
    3,617 Posts
    you americans all have wooden houses that get raped by tornadoes so easily. i wonder what would happen to a generic european house if a tornado came. other than the roof and windows there shouldnt be any significant damage.
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  30. Post #30
    soccerskyman's Avatar
    October 2009
    4,209 Posts
    you americans all have wooden houses that get raped by tornadoes so easily.
    Well, that's one stereotype I haven't heard yet.
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  31. Post #31
    Gold Member
    Cheshire_cat's Avatar
    September 2006
    3,813 Posts
    you americans all have wooden houses that get raped by tornadoes so easily. i wonder what would happen to a generic european house if a tornado came. other than the roof and windows there shouldnt be any significant damage.
    Europe doesn't have tornadoes as often as the Tornado Alley in the Midwest. I doubt that your SUPERIOR MASTER RACE type of house would fare any better in the middle of an F5.
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  32. Post #32
    TheJoey's Avatar
    June 2010
    4,393 Posts
    you americans all have wooden houses that get raped by tornadoes so easily. i wonder what would happen to a generic european house if a tornado came. other than the roof and windows there shouldnt be any significant damage.
    actually buildings in states that frequently get tornados are built in specific ways so that it can withstand a tornado the best it can. tornados "rape" houses easily anyway though because it's a fucking tornado.

    but if you've never experienced a tornado i guess you would have no idea what the fuck you're talking about anyway, eh, mate?
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  33. Post #33
    Old Member
    mikfoz's Avatar
    January 2006
    350 Posts
    Does anyone know if the OP survived?
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  34. Post #34
    Gold Member
    ketchup v2's Avatar
    September 2011
    4,601 Posts
    you americans all have wooden houses that get raped by tornadoes so easily. i wonder what would happen to a generic european house if a tornado came. other than the roof and windows there shouldnt be any significant damage.
    If you're going to try and insult America, at least make it have some validity. 200+ mph winds would tear any house apart.
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  35. Post #35
    Gold Member
    Adius Shadow's Avatar
    February 2007
    3,669 Posts
    I never understood why being in a car is dangerous.

  36. Post #36
    Gold Member
    Cheshire_cat's Avatar
    September 2006
    3,813 Posts
    I never understood why being in a car is dangerous.
    I believe it is because the tornado can and often will pick up the vehicle and toss it around. When it impacts something, it's like having a car crash at +130 MPH. The exterior would collapse and crush the occupants, especially if it landed upside down.
    It's not worth the risk to try to escape. Tornadoes are usually faster than the car and would eventually catch up and annihilate it.
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  37. Post #37
    EskillV2's Avatar
    May 2010
    2,242 Posts
    And for the love of god, do not think of Silent Hill when you hear the siren..
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  38. Post #38
    Gold Member
    solid_jake's Avatar
    November 2007
    15,909 Posts
    I think we need a moment of silence for OP until he answers
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  39. Post #39

    July 2011
    2,327 Posts
    If he survived, I doubt the first thing he'd do would be to post on FP
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  40. Post #40
    TheJoey's Avatar
    June 2010
    4,393 Posts
    i think best case scenario right now is he lost power, so keep hope!
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