1. Post #41
    Gold Member
    gamefreek76's Avatar
    October 2005
    7,237 Posts
    I guess that wood chipper had a contempt for the bourgeoisie.

    I apologize in advance for that uncouth joke.
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  2. Post #42
    Gold Member
    squids_eye's Avatar
    July 2006
    5,836 Posts
    I used to help my dad with the wood chipper all the time when I was a kid. I wouldn't blame the dad for this, we don't know the exact circumstances. He could have told the boy not to come near but he wanted to help anyway.
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  3. Post #43
    Gold Member

    August 2007
    3,017 Posts
    I just hope it was head first. At least it would have been quick and perhaps he would've been knocked out somehow... What a nightmare.
    Not much of a consolation to be honest.
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  4. Post #44
    nox
    nox's Avatar
    March 2007
    2,222 Posts
    What the fuck, I thought they didn't make wood chippers much larger than an arm's width. This is probably the saddest thing I've heard in a while.
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  5. Post #45
    Gold Member
    gamefreek76's Avatar
    October 2005
    7,237 Posts
    What the fuck, I thought they didn't make wood chippers much larger than an arm's width. This is probably the saddest thing I've heard in a while.
    6 year olds are pretty small.
    And he probably had a large commercial chipper, since he owns a tree removal business.
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  6. Post #46
    Gold Member
    Mr. N's Avatar
    July 2010
    2,788 Posts
    If I ever become a father I am not letting my child near dangerous equipment.

    Ever.

    Edited:

    Not much of a consolation to be honest.
    For the father probably not, but you'd hope he went with as little pain as possible.
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  7. Post #47
    Movie quote goes here, because...
    Dennab
    October 2008
    8,076 Posts
    I feel sick.
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  8. Post #48
    Gold Member
    Petrussen's Avatar
    May 2007
    2,789 Posts
    Uh, title is a bit misleading.

    Makes it look like the kid killed his helping dad with a wood chipper.
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  9. Post #49
    Gold Member
    Ninja Duck's Avatar
    July 2010
    12,029 Posts
    I imagine the outcome would be the same as that mechanic at a Texan airport who got sucked into a jet engine and his remains were splattered... everywhere.

    ( http://message.snopes.com/showthread.php?t=60975 NSFW obviously )
    This is a brutal world we live in.
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  10. Post #50
    Movie quote goes here, because...
    Dennab
    October 2008
    8,076 Posts
    This is a brutal world we live in.
    It's just the reality of it. We are just blobs of charged fat and water and bones. We can die and just because we have the ability to ponder, we're unfortunately not sacred in the eyes of objects and nature. Just makes the loss even greater IMO. Dying isn't always a process. Sometimes it just happens in an instant.

    As far as we know, the kid doesn't care that he died because... all he was, was a blob of intelligent meat. Sometimes, it's a painfully brutal world we live in. Painfully real.
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  11. Post #51
    Gold Member
    Dantai's Avatar
    December 2005
    2,840 Posts
    I have a feeling the dad had no idea the kid was even near the wood chipper, I don't think any sane person in the world would let a 6 year old help them put tree branches in a wood chipper..

    It says his son was helping him, but it was likely he had him doing something else somewhere else in the yard.
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  12. Post #52
    Gold Member
    cecilbdemodded's Avatar
    January 2005
    6,585 Posts
    If you are going to work with dangerous machinery, and a wood chipper is as dangerous as it gets, why would you take your kids? Why is a 6 year old even in the vicinity?

    What's next, some crocodile keeper taking his kid into the crocodile pen? No one could be that stupid.
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  13. Post #53
    Gold Member
    Andokool12's Avatar
    November 2008
    13,228 Posts
    I feel sorry for the kid, but this is an example of why some people shouldn't be allowed to have kids.
    Because sometimes they grow up to be people like you aimlessly throwing around catchphrases and buzzwords and making bandwagon decisions because they are too retarded to give any proper thought on the subject to formulate their own response?
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  14. Post #54
    Gold Member
    _jesterk's Avatar
    March 2012
    1,423 Posts
    Yeah because all 6 year olds listen, right?
    This.

    Bill Cosby says it best:

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  15. Post #55
    Movie quote goes here, because...
    Dennab
    October 2008
    8,076 Posts
    I could imagine that the kid had found a long branch and was playing with the machine by putting the tip in and taking it back up to assess the damage. I could easily see it finally catching it and him just holding on hard only for it to go horribly wrong. It would be the only way i can see this happening.
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  16. Post #56
    Dennab
    August 2011
    3,194 Posts
    Oh god I'm going to hell because I can't stop laughing.

    RIP kid, what a way to go.
    What the flying FUCK is wrong with you? God fucking damn it holy shit.
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  17. Post #57
    Gold Member
    capgun's Avatar
    January 2005
    1,426 Posts
    Oh dear God thats horrible. I couldnt wish that on anybody. You'd think there'd be some kind of fail safe on these things, but I cant imagine how you'd do it.
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  18. Post #58
    Dennab
    March 2012
    867 Posts
    Wow that's horrible. I'm sure the dad is just in pieces right now.
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  19. Post #59
    Gold Member
    Dennab
    March 2009
    2,583 Posts
    Wow that's horrible. I'm sure the dad is just in pieces right now.
    i hope you didn't mean that as a pun, because if you did, you're a horrible person
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  20. Post #60
    Dennab
    March 2012
    867 Posts
    i hope you didn't mean that as a pun, because if you did, you're a horrible person
    It's not a pun, I'm just saying the dad is probably all torn up about it.
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  21. Post #61
    Crypt_Keeper's Avatar
    October 2007
    89 Posts
    It's not a pun, I'm just saying the dad is probably all torn up about it.
    Trying too hard now. Still not funny, ass.
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  22. Post #62
    Dennab
    March 2012
    867 Posts
    Trying too hard now. Still not funny, ass.
    Well all I can say is that the best thing to do when something bad happens is to stay chipper.

    (User was banned for this post ("News pun" - Starpluck))
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  23. Post #63
    Ask me about my 'female train' fetish.
    Dennab
    January 2006
    5,457 Posts
    What the flying FUCK is wrong with you? God fucking damn it holy shit.
    Hello welcome to the internet.

    I'm allowed to laugh at this shit.
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  24. Post #64
    Gold Member
    Anglor's Avatar
    February 2007
    925 Posts
    it's raining men, hallelujah, it's raining men
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  25. Post #65
    nox
    nox's Avatar
    March 2007
    2,222 Posts
    Well all I can say is that the best thing to do when something bad happens is to stay chipper.
    Oh wow so funny tell me more please
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  26. Post #66
    Gold Member
    Watevaman's Avatar
    August 2005
    6,666 Posts
    I'm 21 and honestly still nervous around a wood chipper. Those things are just designed to fuck shit up. A neighbor of mine had his arm taken off by one years ago, so maybe that's why.
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  27. Post #67
    3picFail's Avatar
    May 2010
    2,073 Posts
    Cant believe that a father would even let their kid around a wood chipper. I know he probably had the full intent of watching him and keeping him safe while using the chipper, but even while being watched there's so much that could go wrong. I'd maybe let my nephew throw a stick in for the sake of doing it once, like a father would let their kid have a sip of beer, but letting him work with us around that kind of equipment would be out of the question. If you have a decent grip or are grabbing whatever your putting into a chipper in the wrong place, you get pulled in easy regardless of age.
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  28. Post #68
    SJW 4 lyfe
    DaysBefore's Avatar
    December 2009
    7,358 Posts
    Well all I can say is that the best thing to do when something bad happens is to stay chipper.
    Puns are bannable now mate. Just a heads up.

    Also that was very tasteless.
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  29. Post #69
    whoa thats like a scene out of a coen brothers movie

    oh wait...
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  30. Post #70
    LegndNikko's Avatar
    October 2009
    9,439 Posts
    I read the title, thinking "Oh, please God, no, don't mean what I think it means..."

    I was incredibly disappointingly right... That's gotta be high on the list of worse ways to die, arguably higher on ways to lose someone...

    I feel really sorry for the family, especially the father...
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  31. Post #71
    geoface's Avatar
    April 2010
    2,366 Posts
    that shit right there, that's fucked up
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  32. Post #72
    I'd buy that for a dollar
    Dennab
    September 2008
    5,876 Posts
    Oh god I'm going to hell because I can't stop laughing.

    RIP kid, what a way to go.


    Dude what the fuck?
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  33. Post #73
    Gold Member
    Disotrtion's Avatar
    February 2012
    2,382 Posts
    Absolutely terrible, that father is going to be traumatized for the rest of his life.
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  34. Post #74
    Gold Member
    Parakon's Avatar
    November 2008
    8,520 Posts
    I don't think you could've gotten me close enough to a wood chipper as a kid for this to happen. I watched too many scary movies out of curiosity and thus was in "everybody and everything is out to kill me" mode.
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  35. Post #75
    Gold Member
    CaptainQuirk's Avatar
    October 2008
    3,594 Posts
    Score 1 to the Proletariat!
    Why did I expect this?
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  36. Post #76
    C:\
    C:\'s Avatar
    March 2011
    1,749 Posts
    Oh god I'm going to hell because I can't stop laughing.

    RIP kid, what a way to go.
    You sick, useless fuck. People like you should be domesticated. I bet you would love to fucking jump into a wood chipper if you find it that funny. Or maybe see your mother jump into one, or any of your loved ones.

    (User was banned for this post ("Flaming" - Orkel))
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  37. Post #77
    Gold Member
    Snake7's Avatar
    May 2011
    1,765 Posts
    I know this is horrible, but I couldn't help be reminded of Fargo.
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  38. Post #78
    Gold Member
    All0utWar's Avatar
    March 2011
    1,640 Posts
    Wow, that's terrible. If that was my kid I would have a mental breakdown. He was only 6 years old too, now I get to feel sad before I go to bed.
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  39. Post #79
    Gold Member
    TheDecryptor's Avatar
    September 2006
    4,257 Posts
    If you are going to work with dangerous machinery, and a wood chipper is as dangerous as it gets, why would you take your kids? Why is a 6 year old even in the vicinity?

    What's next, some crocodile keeper taking his kid into the crocodile pen? No one could be that stupid.
    Speaking of Australians, a while back something similar happened here (with adults though, guys sleeve got caught IIRC), as a result they started attaching dead man switches to the larger wood chippers so somebody has to be there holding the lever to keep the machine running. It's a great idea, no idea why they aren't used more.
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  40. Post #80

    November 2011
    29 Posts
    AND NOTHING OF VALUE WAS LOST
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