1. Post #1
    I tried to pay a prostitute for a hug, but she turned me down because I'm a huge faggot.
    kirederf7's Avatar
    July 2010
    2,855 Posts
    Last night I tried to pay a hooker for a hug. I drove down to the adult motel where there are always girls standing out front. Before I could even park one was waiting at my door and she asked me if I needed a date. I told her yes and she said she had her own room. We went in and I sat down on the bed and she started laying out the price. She told me it was 200 for an hour or 50 for a bj. I told her I just wanted to hug for a little while and wanted to know what it would cost. She looked a little pissed and told me we could cuddle after sex. But I reiterated my statement that I only wanted to hold her and how much would it cost. She told me to get out and when I asked why she said because I'm a cop you idiot. So I walked out a little confused and when I opened the door there were two guys in bulletproof vests waiting outside and the door to the room next door was open. There were two more cops in there and when I looked in they both turned away and started laughing like schoolgirls. One of the other two told me I was free to go but he never wanted to see me around there again so I got in my car and drove home.
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  2. Post #2
    Gold Member
    Mr.T's Avatar
    August 2010
    2,691 Posts
    I can give you a hug!
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  3. Post #3
    Fabulous Vailglorous Extraordinaire
    Haxxer's Avatar
    February 2007
    10,705 Posts
    If you're so desperate that you pay for hugs...
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  4. Post #4
    Gold Member
    samframpton's Avatar
    May 2008
    2,447 Posts
    This is what I imagine a 7 year old thinks hookers do.
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  5. Post #5
    Gold Member
    moesislack's Avatar
    January 2011
    3,158 Posts
    FREE HUGS! Only costs one plane ticket.
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  6. Post #6
    Gold Member
    sami-elite's Avatar
    May 2007
    3,810 Posts
    What this can't be real. Too good.

    I think a real hooker would accept the request though.
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  7. Post #7
    RedCzar's Avatar
    December 2009
    166 Posts
    To get revenge for not getting a hug you should rat out the cop to anyone who tries getting a hooker at that motel.
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  8. Post #8
    Gold Member
    moesislack's Avatar
    January 2011
    3,158 Posts
    To get revenge for not getting a hug you should rat out the cop to anyone who tries getting a hooker at that motel.
    Yeah dress up like a hooker stand outside and walk up to every one and say in a sexy voice "this building is full of cops".
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  9. Post #9
    Gold Member
    Barnhouse's Avatar
    September 2005
    16,622 Posts
    This is too good to be true. I am fucking dying here. PRICELESS.
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  10. Post #10
    DisasterWolf's Avatar
    August 2010
    145 Posts
    Wait, is prostitution illegal?

    Damn, there goes my life plan...
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  11. Post #11
    Gold Member
    Treybuchet's Avatar
    May 2009
    2,496 Posts
    wait a second
    that would have been entrapment on their part, you understand that?
    you walked to a motel
    and then she went up to you and talked to you
    you didn't solicit anything, you had it offered to you
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  12. Post #12
    Rad McCool's Avatar
    August 2009
    3,883 Posts
    wait a second
    that would have been entrapment on their part, you understand that?
    you walked to a motel
    and then she went up to you and talked to you
    you didn't solicit anything, you had it offered to you
    He would still get charged. Haven't you ever seen Cops?
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  13. Post #13
    Gold Member
    TheForeigner's Avatar
    November 2008
    6,966 Posts
    Wait, is prostitution illegal?

    Damn, there goes my life plan...
    it is legal in many eu countries, just pimping is illegal
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  14. Post #14
    Gold Member
    Coridan's Avatar
    April 2006
    1,188 Posts
    That's odd. I thought they arrest you right when you pick them up. I've never heard of them waiting until you get back to "their room".

    Since when do hookers buy their own hotel rooms anyway?

    I call bullshit.
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  15. Post #15
    Gold Member
    Explosions's Avatar
    September 2010
    5,038 Posts
    He would still get charged. Haven't you ever seen Cops?
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  16. Post #16
    Gold Member
    sami-elite's Avatar
    May 2007
    3,810 Posts
    it is legal in many eu countries, just pimping is illegal
    No it's illegal unless you're registered i think.
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  17. Post #17
    Melnek's Avatar
    April 2010
    2,930 Posts
    What this can't be real. Too good.

    I think a real hooker would accept the request though.
    It's from 4chan.
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  18. Post #18
    Bryanrocks01's Avatar
    May 2009
    6,850 Posts
    That's odd. I thought they arrest you right when you pick them up. I've never heard of them waiting until you get back to "their room".

    Since when do hookers buy their own hotel rooms anyway?

    I call bullshit.
    They have to discuss prices and exchange money before they can arrest him.
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  19. Post #19
    Facepunch Babysitter
    BANNED USER's Avatar
    July 2009
    12,254 Posts
    I used to be friends with a hooker turned exotic dancer, she was one of the nicest people ever.

    Nicest person during sex too.
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  20. Post #20
    Gold Member
    J4censolo's Avatar
    May 2007
    3,055 Posts
    Haven't you seen Reno 911?
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  21. Post #21
    hug9000's Avatar
    July 2009
    487 Posts
    I'm trying really hard to not make a joke with my nickname.
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  22. Post #22
    Facepunch Babysitter
    BANNED USER's Avatar
    July 2009
    12,254 Posts
    That's good, it probably wouldn't be very funny anyway. :buddy:
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  23. Post #23
    I'm a Cthulhu!
    DaMoggen's Avatar
    January 2011
    5,275 Posts
    You should have said "I'll give you $5 for a hug."
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  24. Post #24
    I paid $10 for this
    Upturned_Walrus's Avatar
    May 2010
    88 Posts
    I pissed myself.
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  25. Post #25
    Gold Member
    Treybuchet's Avatar
    May 2009
    2,496 Posts
    You should have offered her a smoke
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  26. Post #26
    Gold Member
    Stupideye's Avatar
    October 2006
    12,424 Posts
    this thread is goty
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  27. Post #27
    Gold Member
    Sethorion's Avatar
    July 2005
    1,264 Posts
    Godamn, Facepunch has some massive introverts on it.
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  28. Post #28
    NotMeh works out at home.
    Perfumly's Avatar
    June 2009
    12,093 Posts

    Okay OP.
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  29. Post #29
    Gold Member
    samframpton's Avatar
    May 2008
    2,447 Posts
    Okay OP.
    He obviously wanted to share the story with everyone he could...
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  30. Post #30
    I tried to pay a prostitute for a hug, but she turned me down because I'm a huge faggot.
    kirederf7's Avatar
    July 2010
    2,855 Posts

    Okay OP.
    I posted this on 4chan and facepunch..

    I just want a hug...
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  31. Post #31
    ExplodingGuy's Avatar
    December 2009
    7,484 Posts
    I'll hug you.

    25$ for one second.

    10$ for each second after that.
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  32. Post #32
    hyper-articulate
    Roll_Program's Avatar
    October 2007
    11,917 Posts
    I posted this on 4chan and facepunch..

    I just want a hug...
    Seem you just want attention online.
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  33. Post #33
    Gold Member
    Activeellis's Avatar
    December 2009
    2,562 Posts
    I posted this on 4chan and facepunch..

    I just want a hug...
    Liar.
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  34. Post #34
    NotMeh works out at home.
    Perfumly's Avatar
    June 2009
    12,093 Posts
    I posted this on 4chan and facepunch..

    I just want a hug...
    ill give you botd
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  35. Post #35
    Gold Member
    GunskiMod's Avatar
    March 2008
    3,297 Posts
    Seem you just want attention online.
    No shit. Why else would he make a thread?
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  36. Post #36
    ill give you botd
    that'll be tough to beat

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  37. Post #37
    tommofandan's Avatar
    August 2009
    859 Posts
    I found that really cute actually.
    I'll give you a hug OP. Anytime.
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  38. Post #38
    Gold Member

    October 2008
    3,838 Posts
    ill give you botd
    Ban Of The Day?
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  39. Post #39
    NotMeh works out at home.
    Perfumly's Avatar
    June 2009
    12,093 Posts
    Ban Of The Day?
    or benefit of the doubt
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  40. Post #40
    Gold Member
    Treybuchet's Avatar
    May 2009
    2,496 Posts
    Battletanks
    on the driveway
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