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Post #1
Here's the new Atomic Riders movie!
It was like 40gb uncompressed lol, glad to have it off my harddrive. Hope you guys like it.
http://www.youtube.com/user/Fumples
Click the above link to watch the original Atomic Riders Episodes, I-IV.
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Here's my constructive clits:
Your shaky cam gave me a headache. Seriously, that shit was way too intense. (I'm fucking serious, my head is pulsating right now)
Your OST lacks personality. One second it's rock, the next it's bloody fucking orchestral! Don't mix it up as much. I know you're going for the "epic and super awesome" Kind of film but sometimes it just doesn't work out.
The voice acting. Oooohhhh the voice acting. Please work on that man. I think you know what I'm going to say :)
Good points
It was entertaining
You finally started adding personality to your characters. Well done.
Cinematic (In some aspects)
Keep it up! Don't stop trying until you've reached your goal.
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I give 9.5/10 from the intro, I love it; song is perfect and I love the space views. Rest of the video was bang bang zombee and worse voice acting. It still was quite well made so keep filming.
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Im going to have to completly agree with Rehukotsa, Perfect intro (except shaky cam), great music for it, it flowed perfectly, you had me thinking it was going to be great. But then you fell apart, your flow became horrible, the music fading out before it had any type of closer to the song kinda ruined alot of parts, your selection of music didnt fit in at parts, in the begining yes, but after that you seemed to pick songs you "liked" and somewhat fit with the story, scenes turned into npc wars, voice acting was monotone and average at best, camera movements were awful, at your character intros dont spend so much time, all you need to do is flash there name and almost instantly get back into the film, and the story didnt flow that great. To be honest it seemed like you didnt realy have a plot(execpt for them needing gas), and what little plot that was there, wasnt well writen.
I really hope you take this as constructive criticizem, your group has potential and im really just trying to help you get there.
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I think part of the reason this fell apart towards the end was that I caught the flu while filming, and it was on an extra long weekend, and I wanted to get it completely finished and over with. In the process this hindered my creativity and inspiration that I began the project with.
And the voice acting, as much as I hate it, I tried adding in some, and giving some of the characters personality was my goal. I hate putting in more conversation than was needed, and I had hoped that the voice acting was at least okay, but I guess you guys didn't like it as much :P
I am not sure what I will make next, whether it's a sequel or not, I have no idea. I tried making this video shorter than it was, I hope you guys were at least able to sit through the entire film, but if you would watch the older videos, you'd see that this is almost an exact remake of the first three episodes. If I DO make another movie, I probably won't have another flu, and it will be sure to have much more effort put into it.
Edit: Faolco, you might want to change your beginning phrase, which currently says "Here's my constructive clits" to "Here's my constructive crits"
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Great, just great. I found the humor, the posing and storyline to be all great! The only things I would suggest you should do are, get a better voice editing program or use your own voice for different sequences, and use the shaky cam just a slight tad bit less... Everything was five star material.
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The part after the intro Was extremely similar to Borderlands Intro ;P
I don't if you tried to do it like that Or did it just come out that way?
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The medic scene was delightfully amazing.
Other than that, flow's OK, needs less shaky cam.
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Like the others said,
-bad acting
-bad camera movement
-bad plot
The 3 main points you need to improve.
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The camera was OK, you just need to really calm down on the shaking
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:smug:
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I think its best to wait until you get well next time when you film.
Never film when you have other work you need to finish, or in distress emotionally, or physically.
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Yeah yeah, I got ya :P
I was practically yelling at everyone towards the end of the filming, I was really tired and pissed off.
Hopefully my next video won't suffer from that like this one did
And to RapistSanta, I have actually seen the Borderlands intro... This is what inspired me to make the film, but I didn't try and replicate anything from the actual game itself. Are you talking about the scene on the bus?
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This video is great. Post this on garrysmod.com
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Really?
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i give it a eight... It needs more storyline... Like what was the thing that destroyed civilization? why was there a missile? Who launched it?
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That wasn't my main focus. The storyline was weak, mostly focusing on action, however if you expected an explanation for the introduction, which is completely abandoned in the rest of the movie, your expectations for the film's depth were set too high.
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I would say what I think (my opinion) but I might get banned...
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Worst piece of shit ever.
(User was banned for this post ("This isn't constructive criticism" - Benji))
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I forgot to thank you for the suggestion. It eventually did get on garrysmod.com (front page :D) and now i got a whole buncha subscribers + over 5000 views on the video!
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Yep it happens when you get on gmod.com
If you want above 5000-11000 views, with out having subscribers like dasboshitt.
Gmod.com is your best bet.
Also for ever gmod.com post you get its 50-100+ subscribers.
Guarantee NO MONEY DOWN! THATS RIGHT ITS GUARANTEE!
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Did you use a voice changer? Sounds like it, it's ridiculous.
Also the whole thing was a bit anti-climactic, as if it wanted to lead up to something. But then it suddenly cut off and rolled the credits.
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Yes. I used a voice changer.
And if you noticed, it DID leave on a cliffhanger (the explosion) and a sequel is in the works.
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That was an explosion? I thought the digital weird effect was just a 'the end lol here's a funky digital effect and the credits' thing.
And either way the movie needed its own climax, even if it's going to be a cliffhanger for some sequel. Otherwise it just feels awkward and strange.
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Jeff's voice made me lol.
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Okay, fuck you then.
Lol JK, that was me. Voice probably went lower than it should have, I, being a 15-year old caucasian and having no black roots, do not sound like a black person whatsoever, so I figured I could just BS it with the voice changer. Lol.
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You are very welcome. BRO
start of every sentence with "Yo/Yo man" and end every sentence with "man". It is that simple. Throw in some "damns" and you are good
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I am not accustomed to such primitive dialects.
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Heres a example.
"YO YO YO DOWG! YA YOU DOWG! MAN WHAT YA UP TOO! OK SEE THAT LITTLE CRACKA OVER THEIR! YEAH GO ROB THAT BIUTCH!"
Nah just make the voice alittle deeper, you don't need to butcher there vocab.
The stereotypical things that black people say, Is from idiots on the street and old southern stereotypes.
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I said nothing about mulitiple "yo"s and Dowg/cracka. What the fuck is that bull shit. You can sound alittle urban without sounding fucking stupid, like you pointed out. God damn, use some common sense before you fucking make up your mind if it is a good idea or not.
It needs to be subtle and used in small amounts. When ever it seems like it could fit. Not all fucking black people have low voices. Scoutking is just trolling because he is cool.
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Coolguy, I appreciate your defense on my end, and although it probably would look like a troll from the tension between ScoutKing and I, we have resolved our creative differences/douchebaggery over Facepunch PMs.
He is only trying to be funny (I admit I lol'd at the blatant racism). I can see where you were coming from on that, Coolguy, as things haven't sat so well between us, but I can assure you that we DID talk it over on PMs.
Cracka motha FUCKA
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Im just pointing out.
Don't make the black guy the "gangsta"
If I was making the black character I add a deeper tone in the voice and maybe a southern accent if you want to push it.
Also seeing its post-jugement day I dont think a "gangsta" (not black people but idiots in general who act "gangsta") would survive.
Edited:
Please learn the difference from racism, or someone who is trying to show what racism is and say its the wrong approach.
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Please don't racism in this thread. kthx
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Cool. I'm glad you two can now get along and bash on shitty first time post random movie threads, instead of each of yours. Both of you make awesome movies and I'm glad that the Garry's Mod machinima "community" is now a little bit closer.
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Slash Agree.
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i like your combining of parts from half life 2(combine, rebels,jeep,etc) and fallout 3(nukes, hundreds of ears into the future,etc)
pretty good except for some of the voice actio
9.2/10
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Lots of boxes, i dont understand why. (7!)
Atleast you have some storage now.
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Best typo ever
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lol....my mistake
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100 Ears Later....
WHY DO THEY KEEP FALLING OFF JESUS CHRIST
Dumb x 9
Artistic x 4
Agree x 11
Bad Spelling x 1
Disagree x 3
Funny x 3
Friendly x 2
