I completely understand all the points you make. And personally, I am undecided what I think of the issue - nevertheless, I'm seeing a crossroad.
There appears to be a divide in what game you wish to create, versus the game the community wants. Forgive me for putting words into your mouth, but you seem to aim at creating a hardcore survival game where raiding is one of the main incentives, realism is important and playing with friends is essential to succeed. The community on the other hand, may not want a hyper-realistic, brutal to the core game that forces you to begin from pretty much scratch every time you log in. Now, as the main game developer/designer, you have a bigger picture for what you want to implement. But to me, the average tester, I'm struggling to see how all of the traps, defenses and so forth is going to be successful.
To me, it will just create an even larger learning curve, where until you can build these defenses, large groups or even solo raiders will raid the heck out of you. Unless you find friends to help you. I understand how you want people to play cooperatively, and if that is the direction you want to take it, then all power to you - it's your game. Personally, I love playing solo - and don't have the equipment to use voice chat, which is pretty much essential to play cooperatively in this game.
Can I suggest to you that raiding doesn't need to be the only thing that makes this game fun? Sure, it's fun for a lot of people - but just as many people love building, surviving, and the occasional gunfight. The risk of losing all your items is great - but it's already there, and needs to be, as it creates an intense atmosphere which is a huge part of immersive gameplay. And the sleeper idea is creative yet great - I just think the negatives brought up in this thread outweigh the positive.
At the end of the day, it's your game. You are in charge of it all, and you may have the vision to bring to pass stuff we can't see happening from our perspective. Make sure you make the wisest choice, weighing the communities words versus your own core beliefs.
"The community" which me and all my clanmates are part of find the direction of this game to be headed the right way.
We love it garry, keep on going - this game is obviously not for this guy, he'd probably be better of playing sims 3.